Flexing his muskles.

Diapering his Nemo

At the age of two, Riley seems to be developing his little mind at a rapid pace.


Emotionally, he is still quite self centered as all things he touches belongs to Riley. Or I-ee as he refers to himself. He is possessive of his toys when other children wants to play with them. He is quite often frustrated but I've tried to teach him to "calm down" by gesturing with my hands, palms down in a downward motion repeating the words "calm down" and he will stop his tantrums (sometimes) and actually calm down while imitating my gesture. He is very humorous and loves to joke with me.

Intellectually, he amazes me. he is beginning to say simple two word sentences, comprehends simple directions as well as directions that involve two or three steps; like "riley, pick up the napkin and throw it in the garbage and sit down on the couch" - he will do it in that exact order. he likes to look at pictures and identify them. in the last week, as he was flipping through a magazine, he saw a car with an Acura emblem and he pointed and said, "daddy, mama car" and each of us of course drive Acuras. He sees the Jewel grocery sign and will declare, "JEW!". He sees pictures of familiar things and will vocalize what they are. We will be in a parking lot of cars and he will single out a Honda CRV and scream out "yeh-yeh" which means "grandpa" who drives a Honda CRV. He asks a million times the names of things and by the end of the day, will know and identify the object as such. He began vocalizing certain feelings such as, "teeckle", "ouch", "hungree".

Physically, he runs, spins, breakdances. He climbs the stairs standing upright and just began climbing down the stairs upright, alone. he is very well adjusted to using forks and spoons and recently is eyeing the chopsticks. he turns single pages of books and while doing so, will lick his finger to moisten them in order to flip. (he imitated me one day while i was flipping through a magazine). he kicks balls, throws balls but he has yet to learn to catch the ball. he is now very capable of dressing himself, as long as i guide his legs into the panthole. he can jump from one end of the room to the other, jump jump jump.

Socially, he is good with solitary play. he is now using dolls or inanimate objects for his pretend play and will feed them, put them to sleep, tell them to eat and shake hands. he likes to imitate cooking, will bring me a plate of his "creation" and when i pretend to love it, he asks if i would like "more?". he refers to himself as I-ee (riley). he is very gentle with infants. he likes to watch before climbing in to play with other children.


Have I told you, Riley, I think you're fabulous.

Who Are You?

I am iced coffee on a cold winter night and pure milk chocolate. I am karaoke junkie. I am bamboo and daisies and tulips and ivy. I am skipping around the block and giggling the entire time. I am peanut butter frozen yogurt, cherry popsicles and peach scented bubble bath. I am dried rosebuds and painted ceilings, I am tousled hair and a invisible tattoo, I am oversized inside-out sweatshirts and kimono bathrobe and wheat-fields. I am raw garlic and korean beansprout and hoisin sauce. I am sour dough bread crust. I am Scorpion.

I am vision, I am art, I am black and white photography. I am almond eyes and creativity. I am hope, I am strength in words, I am cylindrical, stiff pillows and soft goose-down comforters. I am venti iced green tea, I am staring too long at the moon, I am shih-tzus and penguins, otters and wallabies.

I am spinning in the rain, I am a stuffed hippo and decorative pillows, I am black chalk and pastel crayolas, I am collages and mosaic background, I am lost hours in a bookstore. I am blowing bubbles with my saliva, I am foggy mornings, I am phonetic scrabble and student of literature.
I am mysticism and cloud shaping, I am hardwood floors and open windows. I am lying naked under a cotton sheet, I am fiery red silk and whipped cream. I am Adobe Photoshop wannabe and open-mic and Blogger, and a plethora of high frequency voices in panic, I am pizzas and couscous and garbanzos beans.

I am a chip in a tooth, I am Riley’s mother, I am luxury cars with all the windows down, I am jonesing for a cigarette, I am Bach and Beethoven and the Unfinished Symphony. I am bed-head, I am blunt-banged, I am the top of the stairs. I am playdoh and crayola, I am lego and mahogony picture frames, I am right hand on my chin when I ponder.

I am the roaring of the ocean, I am the breaking white water on tall pointed rocks, I am white picket fences and rocky cliffs, I am the Rocky Mountains and deep green valleys and a stampede. I am a lonely peninsula, I am a flock of Canadian geese and Koryo songs, I am polished wood and velvet cushions. I am dusty cathedrals, I am stained glass and terra cotta and smoke rings, I am statues and arid atmosphere and blustery days. I am a Wife.

I am asleep on my stomach, I am in awe of the supernatural, I am striped pajama pants, I am a collection of crossword puzzles and stickers. I am un-stretched collars on white tees, I am scrunching my button nose, I am an egg shaped face and red tear-marks and un-tanned skin. I am Asian fine art, I am poetry, I am steaming green tea. I am loved, I am loveable, I am flat breasts. I am brave, I am strong, I am loud by being quiet, I am phenomenal, I am alive. I am that I am. Simply, I am.

Riley's 2nd Birthday

so long gkworld, hello realworld

i wish i wrote more, like i used to in my gkworld... many years worth, i've lost count. i wish i had more to talk about these days. i wish i wrote poetry like i used to. some of you may remember. some of you have no idea what i'm talking about...because it was THAT long ago. i reflected a lot on the events in my life, trying to make sense of everything.. trying to sort things into their seemingly rightful place in my mind. i wrote a lot and i wrote frequently... and i loved it. i was proud of my writing, sometimes not proud of what I wrote about.. because they were painful times that I'd just as soon erase from memory... but i was proud that i wrote it out just to make it through to the other side. now i feel like i'm on the other side. and on this side, there are no words. i'm not sure if that's good or bad.. or neither. i miss the former side... but only for the flourishing words it afforded me at that time. ifeel like i left a part of myself somewhere along the way. i wonder why i miss that part of me...maybe it's because i felt like i was alive in my writing then, because i had to feel alive somewhere. but now, i'm living life in real time rather than in writing.. and i suppose i couldn't be happier. i'm just a little sad that the writer in me has departed, or is at least uninspired or unmotivated. someone, please poke her with a stick.
rather than ending this post on a reflective note.. tim made my guest bath design into reality. riley and i are so proud of him. he's been working at remodeling for the last week after coming home from a long day's work at the office. i can't imagine working for an additional 4 hours every night after a full work day. i want to be like him when i grow up. it makes me happy to know that riley has such an amazing father.

i can't believe i have my own little family now. a husband, a child.. sometimes i miss my child-free days, when i could go catch a movie on a whim.. or meet friends at happy hour.. or do whatever the heck i wanted whenever i want. but then i think about the daily smiles and giggles.. the hugs around my neck.. and those precious moments i catch between father and son, i just melt and feel that everything is right in my life. if you're a parent, you know.. it's truly amazing to watch a little person develop and grow, right before your eyes. it's like we now have permission to celebrate the little victories that we as adults are no longer entitled to... like sitting up without falling, and eating food for the first time, and laughing for no reason, and walking.. and talking without making any sense (do that as an adult and you're labeled as "crazy"). it's a wonderful thing, living life through a child's eyes.. everything is new and exciting and all you do is soak it in...

model child

Thank you baby for being so patient with Mama and Daddy. We've been very busy the last month but we appreciate you and love you very much! You've been doing so many cute little new things to get our attention and baby bear, none of them go unnoticed.. We love you, Son!

Daddy, can I, can I, please?

Thanksgiving 2007

Grandma, we miss you! Come back!

riley and his oreo

It may be that Riley needs a playmate.. perhaps a brother or sister.. rather than a robot to play with. He would make a wonderful older brother. He'd be gentle and loving as he is with his baby cousin Oriyen...

Got food?

riley does everything BIG. like eating his cereal. he needs two bowls along with his two spoons